


where i'll find happiness

by v1ewmonster



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Background Relationships, Fluff and Humor, Found Family, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Post-Canon, Queerplatonic Relationships, Recovery, Sleep Deprivation, Trauma, apparently there's no found family tag???? man, leopika qpps...
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-03
Updated: 2020-11-03
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:34:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,103
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27375784
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/v1ewmonster/pseuds/v1ewmonster
Summary: On Kurapika's recovery process, and where his quest for the eyes leads him after wandering around without a purpose.(tbh there's a better summary in the notes so you might as well check there lol)
Relationships: Gon Freecs & Kurapika & Leorio Paladiknight & Alluka Zoldyck & Killua Zoldyck, Gon Freecs & Kurapika & Leorio Paladiknight & Killua Zoldyck, Gon Freecs/Killua Zoldyck, Kurapika & Kalluto Zoldyck, Kurapika & Leorio Paladiknight
Kudos: 17





	where i'll find happiness

**Author's Note:**

> uhh hi!! i'm finally contributing to this fandom again with a multichapter fic this time around! like my other multichapters, i'll update this fic whenever i feel like it bc idrc abt update schedules,, and ofc this fic is kurapika-centric like my other hxh fics bc it's my fic and i get to choose the comfort character FGHDJFHD also i'm a firm believer in kurapika's recovery process
> 
> so yea, if u like kurapika and the others recovering from their trauma and hardships, found family elements, qprs and a dash of shipping, this fic is for u!! i'm not rlly tryna please anyone with this fic tho, i'm just doing whatever at this point ghfjfhdj hopefully i won't abandon this fic for months on end,,

“Are you sure we should be doin’ this right now?” Leorio asks. “Kurapika is going to  _ kill  _ us if he sees us going into his room!”

“I’m sure he’ll be fine with it!” Gon says, stepping over something Kurapika must have dropped on the floor. 

Leorio crosses his arms. “I’m not so sure about that… he seemed pretty pissed today, and knowing him, that anger isn’t gonna go away anytime soon.”

“That’s not true!” Gon takes a peek inside the room. The coast appears to be clear, so he gestures Leorio inside. “He just hasn’t had his coffee.”

“I hope you’re right.” Leorio grumbles. Kurapika’s room looks neat and tidy as always. He always knows how to be on top of things, but he doesn’t know how to take care of _himself_ first. But with Leorio’s instructions, he’s been keeping himself in top shape too. He’s going to have to as a form of catharsis. It _has_ proven to be difficult. Kurapika’s refusal mixed with how much of a workaholic he is never ceases to make Leorio want to pull his hair straight out of his head. 

Gon makes no effort to conceal himself as his excitement shows no bounds. Leorio doggedly trails behind him, looking back every so often to see if Kurapika will ever show up. He’s proven wrong with each time he turns around. 

“Hey, what’s this?” Gon asks, face deep into a closet. 

Leorio waves his hands wildly. “Don’t go in there! What if Kurapika-”

“Wow!!” Gon takes out some of Kurapika’s handmade clothing from the closet. “Look at this!”   
Leorio examines the cloth Gon has wrapped in his hand. They’re handmade, alright. Kurapika has mentioned that he makes his own clothes on occasion. But he’s never seen them up close, and especially not when they’re a work in progress. 

“Damn, I knew Kurapika made his own clothes, but I’ve never seen them up close like this,” Leorio says, holding one of them close to his face. “Sounds like he works real hard on ‘em.” Maybe he would have more time to finish them if he didn’t prioritize work over his general happiness…

Gon raises the cloth he’s holding up in the air. It looks to be something Kurapika wore when he was small. That’s when Gon puts his head inside it, which prompts Leorio to say, “Gon, take that off!”

He looked kind of silly, with Kurapika’s old clothing over his own. Gon didn’t seem to mind, so maybe it wasn’t all that bad. “I can’t help it, they look so comfy! Here.” He hands Leorio a larger pair.

Leorio is in no position to object. He merely sighs and says, “Lemme get changed in the bathroom, then…”

It didn’t take too long for Leorio to get changed. Much to his chagrin, the clothes didn’t fit him, but what did he expect when compared to him, Kurapika is puny in size? 

“You look great!” says Gon when Leorio takes another look in the mirror. 

“I look stupid, is what you mean.”

“No!!”

Leorio sighs. He has no choice but to accept Gon’s word for it. “Whatever you say, Gon.”

“He’s right, you know.” 

Leorio almost gasps once he catches sight of Kurapika. He stands by the doorway, a hand laid flat on one side of the wall. He’s wearing his usual suit and tie; must have come back from work. But that begs the question.

“How long have you been standing there?” Leorio asks when he notices Gon running up to hug Kurapika. 

Kurapika smiles softly. “Long enough to see you two looking through my wardrobe out of nowhere.” He says, arms wrapped tightly around Gon. 

“So a long time then?”

At Kurapika’s curt nod, Gon pulls himself out of the embrace. He waves his arms wildly. “Your clothes are really nice!! I can tell that these are handmade as well,” he sinks into the one he’s currently wearing. “You should wear one of them sometime, they’re really soft…”

Kurapika tries desperately to wipe the smile off his face, Leorio can tell. He soon enough gives in, giving them the best smile he can muster. “Thank you, but… I can’t. Not anytime soon.” That signature smile of his soon fades away when everything is said and done. Leorio doesn’t say anything. He  _ knows  _ the reason as to why he said that, and it breaks his heart knowing the cursed knowledge that binds him.

“Can I keep one of these?” Gon asks. 

“Sure,” Kurapika says. “I’m not sure if it will fit you, though. I mean…” He looks at how the outfit Gon currently dons barely fits him, despite the fact that Kurapika wore the outfit when he was his age. 

“I’ll grow into it!” Gon assures him.

“Let’s hope so…” 

Gon stares back with a befuddled expression while Leorio continues to drown himself in his thoughts. Most of them concerned Kurapika, and why he said what he said. But when he sees him walking away, there’s no time for him to ask. He  _ knows better  _ than to ask Kurapika pointless questions. 

His concern may have plummeted since Kurapika settled down with him, but there’s still lots of negative qualities within him that need to be worked out. Leorio knows this more than anyone. Kurapika wouldn’t want to admit it, but Leorio will do it for him. 

“We should get going, Gon,” Leorio says as he heads into the bathroom. “I should be makin’ dinner by now…”

“Right!” Gon calls from behind. 

Leorio looks in Kurapika’s mirror and sees nothing but what he assumes Kurapika must see when he wakes up every morning. 

“Do you even realize what you’re doing…?” 

  
  
  


Calloused fingers run across silken texture, red eyes rapidly paying close attention to the actions being made. Kurapika is hunched over his desk, not bothering to fix his improper posture. He has been at it for a while now, to the point where he can barely tell what time it is. Crickets warble from the window beside him. The notion of falling asleep has not yet crossed his mind. 

Leorio hasn’t been able to sleep since he first thought of doing so. The sound of a needle and a thread clinking together has been keeping him up. He can’t complain, though. Seeing Kurapika being productive in a much healthier way keeps him at ease. 

He lunges forward, by which Kurapika automatically notices. Except finishing what he started is way more appealing to him than sparking a conversation with his best friend. What’s he doing up so late? He could apply the same question to  _ himself,  _ but… 

“Hey,” Leorio whispers from behind Kurapika. 

Kurapika gives him the cold shoulder as always. 

“Kurapika!!” Leorio’s whisper grows louder with impending agitation. “Don’t ignore me, I wanna see what you’re doing.”

A sigh from Kurapika. He scoots his chair back and shares Leorio his work. Leorio takes a long gander at it, putting a thumbs up, because like his previous work, it totally looks refined. He wonders what it could possibly be for. Another article of clothing Kurapika will keep in his wardrobe until the end of time, probably.

“Lay off, Leorio,” Kurapika says with a mix of annoyance and playfulness in his tone. “I’m trying to finish this…” 

Leorio returns to his spot on the bed. He can watch from a distance. They  _ really  _ should be going to sleep soon, however. 

Kurapika can feel Leorio’s gaze size him up. He doesn’t know  _ how,  _ but he does, and it starts to irritate him. Can’t he fall back asleep instead of watching him work through the night? He finds himself in a place of vulnerability, and Leorio seeing him in said vulnerable state makes his skin crawl. Yet he decides to ask the dreaded question.

“When are you going to sleep?” It’s already so late, Kurapika notes, and Leorio should have hit the hay by now.

Leorio shifts his posture at his question. “When are  _ you?”  _

A snore interrupts the conversation where it stands. Leorio whips his head around to see Gon, out like a light and hanging off the bed. He’s still wearing his street clothes; the poor kid probably didn’t have enough energy to change out of them. Leorio turns back to Kurapika, awaiting his answer. 

“When I’m done with this…” Kurapika says, turning back to his work.

Leorio emits a sound of disapproval. Kurapika continues to sew without a second thought, as one does. He wants to be angry. Hell, he wants to  _ yell _ at Kurapika for being so careless. But there’s too much concern for the anger inside him to show its true colors. He’s running on fumes, but he prefers to suffer in silence. 

It’s something he doesn’t like about Kurapika. How he doesn’t  _ listen _ . He’ll  _ never  _ listen to a word he says, even if it’s the truth. He’s supposed to be  _ healing,  _ not working in the middle of the night while sleep deprived! Though his current job is not as dangerous as a former mafia boss, he works himself to the bone regardless. 

Kurapika’s hand shakes when the needle clashes with the material. He tries not to think about how Leorio is behind him, waiting until he falls asleep. It’s a thankless job at most.

“I can tell you’re tired,” Leorio says. 

“What do you know?” Kurapika retorts. “And quit worrying about me, it’s going to drain  _ your  _ mental health.” Double emphasis on the ‘your.’

Leorio clicks his tongue. “Who cares as long as you’re okay? I’m not gonna go to sleep until you do.”

“Why?”

“So that you don’t spend  _ another  _ night without sleeping.” 

Kurapika blinks. His concern is laughable. He’s not even sure if he wants him alive for his own selfish reasons, or because he  _ truly  _ cares about him. The scenarios that float seamlessly through his mind draw to a close. 

Sleep clouds his judgement and prepares his brain to shut down. He grits his teeth. Not when he’s  _ almost  _ done with stitching a specific part! He can’t even blame himself for shutting down. Going multiple days without sleep does that to a person. 

“Whatever man,” Leorio says, leaning backwards. He carries a magazine in his hand. “I’m still gonna fight you on it.” 

“Why?” Kurapika asks. “Don’t you realize it’s pointless?” 

Leorio flips a page from the magazine. “Yeah, that’s why I’m doing it.”

Kurapika sighs through clenched teeth. He shouldn’t have asked such a question, a question that would only lead to something so glaringly obvious. His actions soon become dizzying the more he makes a move. How long will it take until he—

“—at least with this method, I can help you fall asleep manually.” Leorio looks up from his book quizzically.

All that responds is silence. That and Gon’s consistent snoring. 

“Kurapika?” 

No response. Must’ve fallen asleep. His claim is proven once he sees Kurapika face first in the cloth he spent so much time stitching together. 

Leorio leans back into the bed in sweet relief. He  _ would  _ have carried him to bed, but the bed isn’t enough for the three of them, unfortunately. Plus he seems to manage sleeping well on the desk. Of course he’s acclimated himself to such a harsh environment…

He crosses one leg over the other. At least he can rest easy, knowing Kurapika is doing the same. 

  
  
  


Leorio wakes up to quite a sight. Kurapika is standing in front of his desk, eyes red and puffy with sleep. He’s still wearing his discernable suit since yesterday, but the edges are wrinkled. He’s… panting. 

“G’morning, Kurapika,” Leorio manages to spit out. Kurapika still looks agitated. 

“I didn’t finish it last night…” Despite his evident ire, Kurapika’s tone sounded soft. 

Leorio eyes him quizzically. “You can finish it when you eat breakfast.” 

Kurapika swallows down the words that tumble to and from his throat. He’s right. He should focus on getting substance inside his system. As long as he has the opportunity to finish what he started…

“You’re right,” He says, hands clutching the chair that’s unoccupied in front of him. “Let me just get my morning coffee first…” 

_ You really need it…  _ Leorio would have said out loud, had Kurapika not already gone off on his own.  _ Again _ .

Leorio follows him into the living room, watching him become greeted by Alluka and become immersed in their own little conversation. A sense of relief washes over him, giving him the sense that maybe, in his own unique way, Kurapika will be able to unlearn the bad habits he’s obtained over the years. 

All it takes is a little push. And if he’s lucky, a leap of faith. 


End file.
